As can be expected, Judaism does not celebrate Saint Valentine’s Day which is a Christian celebration.  But does Judaism have an alternative?

There is no simple answer to that question.  In the Jewish calendar the 15th of Av (one of the Hebrew months) is a day when, in days long past, young men who were not married or betrothed went out in search of a wife.

The original “festival” seems to have originated before the fall of the Second Temple in 70 CE. It is first mentioned in the Mishnah (The first major written collection of Jewish oral traditions known as the Oral Torah and the first major work of rabbinic literature compiled and edited in the end of the second century). In this collection of writings, Rabbi Shimon Ben Gamliel (around 52 CE) is credited with saying:

“There were no happier days for the people of Israel than the Fifteenth of Av and Yom Kippur, since on these days the daughters of Israel go out dressed in white and dance in the vineyards saying: Young man, consider whom you choose for your wife)” (Ta’anit, Chapter 4).

But why the 15th of Av? The Gemara (a traditional interpretation of the Talmud) says that on this day the Biblical “tribes of Israel were permitted to mingle with each other,” or marry women from other tribes. However nowhere in the Bible is there a prohibition on “intermarriage” among the 12 tribes of Israel. Talmudic scholars’ postulate that this possibly refers to a story in the Book of Judges (chapter 21): After a civil war between the tribe of Benjamin and other Israelite tribes, the tribes vowed not to intermarry with men of the tribe of Benjamin.

Another explanation for the date, the 15th, is that many Jewish festivals including Passover, Sukkot, and Tisha B’Shvat begin on the full moon between the 14th and 15th of the relevant Hebrew month.  And, since the full moon was associated with love, romance and fertility in many ancient cultures – it’s adoption by Judaism is not surprising.

However, Tu B’Av, is not an especially prominent or celebrated festival in Judaism. In fact, from the destruction of the Second Temple until the establishment of the State of Israel in 1948, the day was only commemorated in morning prayers when certain portions (pertaining to penitence for sins) were omitted. Indeed, for religious Jews, Tu B’Av, has no real significance and is a regular workday across the country.

But it’s a different story among secular Jews in Israel. Perhaps needing a reason to celebrate, faced with the hardships of building a new state and the constant threats surrounding it, the night of Tu B’Av has, over the past 75 years, become associated with singing and dancing.  Just as on Valentines Day, in Israel, on the 15th of Av, men and women give gifts to the person they love, flowers, chocolates, go out for a meal etc., etc.  Indeed, for the flower, restaurant, and entertainment industries, this is an important day in the year as they work overtime to supply the demands.

Interesting facts:  Just six days before the 15th of Av (a joyous occasion), the 9th of Av (Tisha B’Av ) commemorates one of the most solemn and tragic days in the Jewish calendar. This is the day when both the temples were destroyed (the first Temple by the Babylonians in 423 BCE and the second by the Romans in 70 CE).

On this day Jews around the world remember these disasters and other tragedies that have befallen the Jewish people in prayer and by fasting, wearing simple clothes, and not applying any cosmetics. In synagogues, the Book of Lamentations is read and instead of sitting on regular chairs, people sit on low stools as a sign of mourning.

In the ancient Jewish community of Rome, candles used to light the synagogue during Tisha B’Av prayers were extinguished at the end of the day and saved to be used for Hanukah, the Festival of Light.

Other events associated with this date include:

1.       After the Exodus from Egypt, spies were sent out into the Promised land and returned with frightening stories that caused the People of Israel to doubt whether they should continue their trek.

2.       In 133 CE, the Bar Kochba revolt against the Romans ended in defeat. The Jews of Betar (near Jerusalem) were butchered on the 9th of Av.

3.       The Jews of England were expelled from the county of the 9th of Av 1290 and the Jews of Spain on the 9th of Av 1492.

Is there a connection between the two? Some scholars say that Tisha B’Av commemorates death and destruction whilst Tu B’Av celebrates joy and life. Some contend that there is significance in the fact that the two days are just six days apart, the time it took G-d to create the world - from emptiness to life. Others say that the time between the two is one where Jews should consider their lives and the path they wish to take.  But there is no definitive connection between them.